April 16, 2010

Psych Ward ~ Part 3

Posted in recovery tagged , , , , , , at 7:57 pm by eddejae

WARNING: This series of blogs is  very blunt. A bit gutsy. A little angry. Extremely cathartic. Possibly offensive to some, as I don’t plan to censor any language. I apologize ahead of time.


I’m so glad I stayed another day. I just found out I’m going home at 10AM!!!!!!!!!!! If I hadn’t stayed, I wouldn’t have had some of the amazing conversations I’ve had or made the friends that I did. It really was a blessing disguise. I have learned from every single person I’ve come in contact with here:

“Dallas” Cole AKA N-Dogg: 81-year-old man. Mormon. Very sweet. Sang “I Am a Child of God” in group once. Recited a poem that went: “How green is the grass, How green is the grass, Alas, Alas, And how blue is the sky!” Did I mention SWEET?!

Dr. Roman: Dude didn’t recognize me today! When he came to tell me that I could go home, he yelled down the hall “Edde?!” but was standing right in front of me. I was like, “Ummm, I’m right here!” He did a double take, “You’re not Edde.” “Yes, I am!” “Then there are two Eddes here.” “No! Just me! I”m just not wearing black, my hair is back, I’m wearing some make-up and a hat!” “Take your hat off and let me see your wrist band.” “I’m ME, I SWEAR!” He was making me doubt myself, or rather, doubt who the crazy one was! I swear he’s in the mafia. Or a serial killer. Something.

Shelly AKA My Angel: 20 years old, angelic and innocent girl with a nerve problem so she can’t sit down for long and walks with her hands posed in front of her like a China doll. She is beautiful and her spirit shines through her broken body. She loves to sing and her favorite song that she knows ALL the lyrics to is “My Heart Will Go On” from Titanic. I woke up one morning to her singing in the hallway. It was so cute. She calls me Barbie Doll and is always asking how old I am and what my disorder is. Once in a while she will come up with a sarcastic comment so seemingly out-of-character it is adorable. Her mom visits her every day and she says she wants to live with her parents forever.

Sergei: Russian dude. My buddy. He has social anxiety and kind of looks to the side of you and not directly in the eye unless you make him smile or laugh. He likes to sit in the rocking chair and rock back and forth. At first he would always sit outside of the group by himself, but I started sitting by him and talking to him and he eventually started participating, even commenting once in a while. He is way cool and so sweet. His whole family lives in Moscow and he goes to [nearby college]. They don’t know he’s here and he doesn’t get any visitors. He is one of my favorite people ever! I like to tease him a bit, like when he leaves the room I will say “Where ya goin Sergei? You’re breakin my heart!”



  1. Saint said,

    These posts are amazing, Edde. I know it’s cathartic to let it all out – maybe over time, when you doing even better, maybe you should transfer these into a novel or a screenplay… capture your story. You are so poetic and honest – it tugs at my heartstrings. I love you, sweetie. Keep writing. It’s good for the soul. 🙂

    • Edde said,

      I am already planning to turn all my experiences into an autobiographical novel 🙂 Thank you for reading and commenting on my blog, it means so much to me.

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